Posts Tagged ‘motivation’

Feel that pinch? Can you live with it?

Thursday, October 20th, 2011 by admin

She said it had taken about 3 or 4 years to finally come in and see me.  The last 6-8 months she had especially wanted to come in.  She just didn’t.

How often can you relate to this; knowing there is something you have wanted for a long time, or something you wish was different but in reality, you haven’t taken any actual steps towards it?

We have opportunities land in front of us every single day.  We might hear a speaker that seems to particularly motivate us; or read a book that at the time, seems like a life changer.  We might have a conversation with someone that is particularly inspiring or perhaps we have a life experience that totally seems to change our perspective.  Or maybe we suddenly realize that we absolutely CAN go into business for ourself and we CAN create wealth and time freedom that we want - and so we buy the starter kit.

And there it stops.  That idea, the inspiration, the life changing perspective - oh yes, they are still there, a part of who we are now.  We just don’t DO anything more.

We saw a surge of the hopefulness that comes withthese ’shift glimpses’ as I call them.  It happened about the time that the movie The Secret made it’s splash.  People were inspired to dream big and realize that they can create their futures - that everything we have believed up to this moment has created our reality.  For some, it was enough of a seed and they ran with it and as a result massive, life changing success stories emerged.

For others, it helped bring about a simple awareness of many choices that were previously thought to be unconscious - and people took more responsibility for their own success. But for the vast majority, it fizzeled out and daily, everyday life patterns were quickly the norm again. These people may not be comfortable with where they are of with what is going on in their lives, with their health or in their relationships, however they tend to stay with what is familiar rather than take a chance - no matter how small it might seem to others, and take a new step from what they have been doing.

For these people "Change won’t occur until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of changing." This is one of the reasons people make comments like:

  • I’ve wanted to come see you for 4 years
  • I have known for a long time that I should change the way I eat
  • I have wanted to start running for ages but my knees/my ankles/my cardio…etc. stopped me.
  • I’ve tried that kind of business before but it never worked
  • That is just they way they are, I guess I have to accept it
  • I can’t make a difference
  • There is no way that will work
  • I couldn’t be like you

As uncomfortable as they say they are in their present state, they are actually not uncomfortable enough to do anything different.  The pain isn’t great enough to cause them to cross the threshold and change something.

Of course there are also the people who are happy to spend their life complaining to others, about others, with others.  They will always have a never ending supply of doom and gloom in the people and experiences they have because naturally they are attracting it by their beliefs and assumptions…But that is another blog altogether.

The pain that I spoke of has many faces.  Fear of course is one of the big ones, unknowns, expectations of consequences, assumptions of results, what ‘I’m sure will happen if…’, and actual physiological pain too.  What most people say though about moving through or beyond or by getting over this ‘thing’ that kept them stuck, is that it was easier/less complicated/less painful or simply more ‘worth it’ than they ever expected.

Generally, it is also much simpler than we have made it out to be.  In the client’s case; she said "I finally just picked up the phone and made the appointment.  Then I showed up."

What happens next is steps in the journey and lots of learning.  But the one thing that is most significant?  She is not in the same place she was for 3 or 4 years, anymore.

Maybe next year…

Sunday, January 2nd, 2011 by admin

The economy will be going gangbusters

Your knowledge will reach critical mass

Your boss will give you the go ahead (and agree to take the heat if things don’t work out)

Your family situation will be stable

The competition will stop innovating

Someone else will drive the carpool, freeing up a few hours a week

There won’t be any computer viruses to deal with, and

Your neighbor will return the lawnmower.

Then…

You can ship, you can launch your project, you can make the impact you’ve been planning on.

Of course, all of these things won’t happen. Why not ship anyway?

[While others were hiding last year, new products were launched, new subscriptions were sold and new companies came into being. While they were laying low, websites got new traffic, organizations grew, and contracts were signed. While they were stuck, money was being lent, star employees were hired and trust was built.

Most of all, art got created.

That's okay, though, because it's all going to happen again in 2011. It's not too late, just later than it was.]

Seth Godin

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It’s the evenings that get me….

Thursday, January 7th, 2010 by admin

"I have no problem during the day, it’s that lull when I get home - before supper, that I cave"

"It’s like an addiction… once I have one bite I just can’t seem to stop"

"I promised myself that THIS YEAR I would stick to it… so far I’ve done ok, but it’s only January 6th"

"I thought I would try and fill my calendar with positive things - I joined the gym (again), I’m trying a yoga class, and I haven’t had a bite of fast food (well unless you count Tim Horton’s cream of broccoli soup) so far this year"

"New Year, fresh start, I’m going for it … and I’m going to go back to weight watchers"

"I’ve tried everything … I’m pretty sure I need to just learn to be happy being big and heavy"

These are all statements I heard just yesterday.  YESTERDAY ALONE.  And I know I will hear more today, and tomorrow.

The puck has dropped.  We are now in the midst of the flurry and scramble of activities to try and make this year the one in which everything comes together. Very soon the mad scramble will lose a little of it’s almost desperate drive, the rhythm will slow down a tempo or two for some, and others will re-position themselves once again as sideline observers because that is what is most familiar.

Many will give up again, citing it’s too hard, Monday is a new day, I’m too tired, the time isn’t right.  There will be another few that actually lift their heads and look up.  They may get a feeling for what is really required  at this stage in order to ensure their plans unfold and results come to be.

It’s facinating really - how this dance occurs.  I say it all the time to people - we stick with or revert back to what we know.  It might not be comfortable or healthy or fun or fulfilling or rewarding to do what we do, we might be downright miserable… and it happens because it is familiar.

But when you learn how to shift the familiar pattern, the implications can be magical.  Imagine if your unconscious patterns simply needed one extra mini step added to dramatically impact your success.  How much longer are you willing to stay in familiar?  What stops YOU from getting what you really want?

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